to god,

hi god, are you still there for me? or am i still going on a wild goose chase like i always do? not that important, or maybe important enough that you are still making me 'learn' from what mistakes i make... i seem to make a lot of them... i want to find peace... just peace... i'm sorry for whatever names i called you.. i wont defend myself... i was selfish back then and even now im being selfish... i just want to be happy... i really want him... for once just make him love me.... i cant lie to myself anymore... i'm sick of it. i really do need him... i was trying not to fall for him... then why let me?? it hurts so much not to have him... i have begged you for giving me back Sam... i have begged you... i have isn't it?? you dint give him back to me... probably cos he deserved better... or whatever... or maybe i needed anish more than i needed him...
or whatever... OK, i don't want him... i will live with it... i promise... just let him have what he wants... please... let him have his dream... please... that one day that he gives pooja... let her be so happy abt it that she never leaves him... i had to write this down... will you please read it... in whatever form you are... some one please talk to her... you talk to her... make her fall for him... let her love him as much he loves her... please...

adi, you are close to god... please convince him , please....

god, i will never cry after that... i promise. i will never ask you for another thing for me... i wont... am i being too selfish??? i never wanted to wake up...