to, adi and dee

you are one of the most loved people of my life and yet i think it would be good to write things to you that probably i have oversaid and yet not managed to say ever....or maybe i have who knows.

well, maybe first of all i should wave off adis fear of losing dee.....my sweetest and dearest harry...no you wont lose her.....coming from me it might not sound believable but yes love has the greatest power in the world. the greatest and the most feared.....thats why so many people are afraid of it...they run away...and yet i say (as i have once done before) love is nothing more than a physical touch of a friendship.

you will always and always remain two separate people who find the reason to 'live' in each other. where you can almost worship if the world allowed you to. the fact that you cant take away her pain and neither can she yours will never make you stop trying....i know you would not only try but also pray, wish and argue with god every single day that she may get alll the happiness u have in you and u may get all the tears.....yes, but the relationship will change...from utopia, to the fears, to the strength, to finding out weaknesses, to fighting about them, to understanding and thinking that they are compromises...but you know what??? these very moments...of little incidences (of bus tickets that i laugh about) to her little bad habits that annoy u, or ur naughty comment that made her red and a little angry later.... to her scolding you for something stupid...thats what you will remember.. always throughout ur life...
i guess that may have answered some of the questions that u keep thinking of asking this dear old hagrid...and may have not been able to ask....and well maybe im just totally wrong....but well thats what i seem to notice

i guess all these things i may have said ...or may have wanted to say.....and it wont have mattered coz i would never have stopped myself from sying it if asked....
what i would have stopped from saying is that i guess i was hurt....when i was breaking down i guess i expected you guys to be thr....both of you
and i guess u just werent
maybe not as i wanted....or maybe not thr at all...and i soon stopped reaching out....stopped calling..stopped even wanting to talk.coz it hurt.talking or even discussing hurt...i guess i never wanted to pretend to you guys...but what the f**k, i guess now it doesnt matter at all.coz ive learnt how not to even think of reachin out to people...best of friends... parents anyone....as anish once put it maybe ive stopped knowing how to trust someone...is it about trust? ,, sometimes i ask ,or is it just thestupid ideal(utopian! :) ) taurian in me... that believes in being there...just there...no matter what the thing is.... what the issue is... or what my other priorities are..... its just me....now that i come to think of it...its just that i have now come to believe that no one is to be expected to do things for u
why should they anyway?
is it a complaint im making to you....??? my answer would be ' no' it will never be a complaint...coz i never set conditions that u had to be thr....had thr been any conditions i would have demanded those...im way to blunt as u guys know maybe.... its just something im saying...coz ive meant to say it. everytime ive met you guys ive wanted to...and ended up reading harry potter...or told random things abt my life....i guess thats whatim like....thr are zcertain things that i cant say..maybe thats y blogs help

well, as formalty requires me to wish u at the end of each letter.....i wish you a life full of the love that you guys have needed, wanted and deserved..... a life full of unlimited dreams and and unknown smiles...more than what you guys wish for each other

love
appu urf hagrid urf whatever!!!!!